I highlighted that I'd prefer we'd invite only family and friends that we're actively communicating and going out with, that I'd rather spend that precious time with people I care most for, rather than being split around tables having to entertain people I rarely even talk to. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. ._2cHgYGbfV9EZMSThqLt2tx{margin-bottom:16px;border-radius:4px}._3Q7WCNdCi77r0_CKPoDSFY{width:75%;height:24px}._2wgLWvNKnhoJX3DUVT_3F-,._3Q7WCNdCi77r0_CKPoDSFY{background:var(--newCommunityTheme-field);background-size:200%;margin-bottom:16px;border-radius:4px}._2wgLWvNKnhoJX3DUVT_3F-{width:100%;height:46px} NTA. They want me to use my savings that I have carefully planned out to pay for my college so that I can graduate without debt to pay for the bridal shower and wedding transportation. ._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa{margin-top:8px}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa ._3EpRuHW1VpLFcj-lugsvP_{color:inherit}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa svg._31U86fGhtxsxdGmOUf3KOM{color:inherit;fill:inherit;padding-right:8px}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa ._2mk9m3mkUAeEGtGQLNCVsJ{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;color:inherit} NTA. Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ. ._2Gt13AX94UlLxkluAMsZqP{background-position:50%;background-repeat:no-repeat;background-size:contain;position:relative;display:inline-block} The mother wants to give them the money to keep the peace but the dad says no. ._12xlue8dQ1odPw1J81FIGQ{display:inline-block;vertical-align:middle} She kinda agrees with it being a small wedding, though, she'd like to invite family members with which she hasn't even spoken in years (to quote her: "they're still family overall, it's not nice"). Specifically, the wedding date is set for Halloween because OP herself (as well as her partner, a 30-year-old . Cookie Notice That's assuming that they *want* a house (they don't, not everyone does), and if they're upset at getting less money? CareyHope/Getty Images. It's the "don't post to FB" episode. Or allow/support others doing the same. So I reckon they will compromise. NTA but there's an easy solution here. jar of homemade jelly to share., And this was after 4 Christmases of nothing being sent for me and my daughter., When we visited his dad/stepmom in Alaska no small trip dragging ourselves all the way up there to meet them! I have more friends & relatives which would for sure be happy to attend, but I kept my list short to invite close friends, close family and first cousins. ._9ZuQyDXhFth1qKJF4KNm8{padding:12px 12px 40px}._2iNJX36LR2tMHx_unzEkVM,._1JmnMJclrTwTPpAip5U_Hm{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);margin-bottom:40px;padding-top:4px;text-align:left;margin-right:28px}._2iNJX36LR2tMHx_unzEkVM{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._2iNJX36LR2tMHx_unzEkVM ._24r4TaTKqNLBGA3VgswFrN{margin-left:6px}._306gA2lxjCHX44ssikUp3O{margin-bottom:32px}._1Omf6afKRpv3RKNCWjIyJ4{font-size:18px;font-weight:500;line-height:22px;border-bottom:2px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line);color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);margin-bottom:8px;padding-bottom:8px}._2Ss7VGMX-UPKt9NhFRtgTz{margin-bottom:24px}._3vWu4F9B4X4Yc-Gm86-FMP{border-bottom:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line);margin-bottom:8px;padding-bottom:2px}._3vWu4F9B4X4Yc-Gm86-FMP:last-of-type{border-bottom-width:0}._2qAEe8HGjtHsuKsHqNCa9u{font-size:14px;font-weight:500;line-height:18px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);padding-bottom:8px;padding-top:8px}.c5RWd-O3CYE-XSLdTyjtI{padding:8px 0}._3whORKuQps-WQpSceAyHuF{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon);margin-bottom:8px}._1Qk-ka6_CJz1fU3OUfeznu{margin-bottom:8px}._3ds8Wk2l32hr3hLddQshhG{font-weight:500}._1h0r6vtgOzgWtu-GNBO6Yb,._3ds8Wk2l32hr3hLddQshhG{font-size:12px;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)}._1h0r6vtgOzgWtu-GNBO6Yb{font-weight:400}.horIoLCod23xkzt7MmTpC{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:#ea0027}._33Iw1wpNZ-uhC05tWsB9xi{margin-top:24px}._2M7LQbQxH40ingJ9h9RslL{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon);margin-bottom:8px} What happens when you cant spend one of the most important days with someone you want to spend your whole life with? NAH, unless of course you try to guilt trip her, then you would be the AH. The parents decided to help out their daughter by giving her $10K for her dream wedding that she already spent half of while planning her big day celebration. This page may contain sensitive or adult content that's not for everyone. You can read more about it and change your preferences, , a leading wedding planner platform in the UK that provides a wide range of services for engaged couples, to find out some insightful nuances about wedding planning. Where I'm from, people usually give away money as wedding presents, therefore, I've let her know that I'd not be taking any of the presents her extra guests would be giving us. "She ain't giving up without a MAJOR fight.". First of all, I'd like to thank everyone for sharing their valuable point of view, it's truly appreciated! By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. My dream is to get an RV and travel around the world with my dog. Im supposed to be a bridesmaid in the wedding. Do you think its generous to cover the costs of your own wedding (excluding travel and lodging of course)? Couples like to put their own personal touches on their weddings and also save money on hiring a wedding planner, shared the CEO of, Get the best of Bored Panda in your inbox. When it comes to weddings, the question of how much of the financial burden should be put on the parents of the bride or groom can be a tricky one. My fiance ( 23M) and I (23 F) are getting married in less than a month. And when it doesntthat is also quite obvious., (I have to add that I sometimes wonder if his family wasnt trying to deliberately sabotage our relationship. To view it, confirm your age. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. Image source: RosieBaker19. I Crochet Miniature Animals, Birds And Other Creatures (30 Pics), Here Is A Collection Of 57 Mind-Boggling 3D Illusion Art Pieces By Kurt Wenner, 50 Times Signs Were So Funny, People Had To Share Them On This Facebook Page, 23 Y.O. We loved her since the first day we met her. cf; pf . Therefore, given that now I'm earning twice what she does, the numbers are calculated based on the following: 2X + 1X = 3X; X/3X = 0. He doesnt like that we arent invited but hes not turning down a free vacation either., After she invited him and his boys and made all the plans and purchased tickets she told him shed pay for their accommodations but he had to help pay for everything else., He barely makes enough money to cover his own bills and his part of our shared bills (mortgage & utilities). We're both financially in a good place, but for the past 3 years I've been earning twice what she makes. I always say have your wedding wherever you want, but dont expect everyone to travel far to attend. (Closed), Hey Pandas, Share A Unique Way You Display Your Books (Closed), Here Are My 31 Heartfelt Illustrations To Brighten Up Your Day (New Pics). This sounds like it is months in advance so people like the dj and photographer have plenty of time to find a new gig. You're getting married somewhere close to wherever you live. Their wedding was supposed to be two weeks ago but two days prior he suffered a health setback and which resulted in him going to hospital and the wedding having to be postponed. My sister-in-law, who lives on the other side of the country, is upset that we won't pay for her ticket and is now refusing to come to the wedding. There is ALOT of background info with about 6 - 7 years worth of information but the TLDR version is this: Back in September 2016, my mom matched with a person on an old person dating website. At that time we hadn't discussed the rules yet, we just knew it would be very strict. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: My mother thinks I'm being an asshole because I don't want her to bring one of her friends to my wedding. I have a feeling that the parents would do exactly that cos they seem like good decent people. They said they would pay for the shower. Skip to GTV: 10:00. Hey! Therefore, we'd have overall about 90-100 guests, give or take. ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{background-color:#fff;box-shadow:0 0 0 1px rgba(0,0,0,.1),0 2px 3px 0 rgba(0,0,0,.2);transition:left .15s linear;border-radius:57%;width:57%}._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS:after{content:"";padding-top:100%;display:block}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:start;justify-content:flex-start;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-navIconFaded10);border:2px solid transparent;border-radius:100px;cursor:pointer;position:relative;width:35px;transition:border-color .15s linear,background-color .15s linear}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3kUvbpMbR21zJBboDdBH7D{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-navIconFaded10)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3kUvbpMbR21zJBboDdBH7D._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-active)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3kUvbpMbR21zJBboDdBH7D._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-buttonAlpha10)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1asGWL2_XadHoBuUlNArOq{border-width:2.25px;height:24px;width:37.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1asGWL2_XadHoBuUlNArOq ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:19.5px;width:19.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1hku5xiXsbqzLmszstPyR3{border-width:3px;height:32px;width:50px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1hku5xiXsbqzLmszstPyR3 ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:26px;width:26px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._10hZCcuqkss2sf5UbBMCSD{border-width:3.75px;height:40px;width:62.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._10hZCcuqkss2sf5UbBMCSD ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:32.5px;width:32.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1fCdbQCDv6tiX242k80-LO{border-width:4.5px;height:48px;width:75px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1fCdbQCDv6tiX242k80-LO ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:39px;width:39px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._2Jp5Pv4tgpAsTcnUzTsXgO{border-width:5.25px;height:56px;width:87.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._2Jp5Pv4tgpAsTcnUzTsXgO ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:45.5px;width:45.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI{-ms-flex-pack:end;justify-content:flex-end;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-active)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z{cursor:default}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{box-shadow:none}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z{background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-buttonAlpha10)} Dad Balks After His Daughter Expects Him To Pay For Her Wedding After Going No Contact For Years. (33)X; 2X/3X = 0. That mean everything had to be canceled- most of which wasn't refundable. This is a huge red flag and your fiance is not making a good decision here.~Top-Ad-2676, This is spot on. "To preface this, we only got engaged about 10 weeks ago and have plans for November 2021, but if there's still issues at the time we'll postpone." Her interests also include photography, literature and hiking. Please listen to the people here who have experienced this. His family and I don't have a super strong connection and that is because I don't spend much time around them. Its uncommon to go halfway down the road of planning a certain type of wedding and then going in the opposite direction.. Non refundable deposit, aren't. ago NTA. ._3oeM4kc-2-4z-A0RTQLg0I{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between} A couple of hours later, the author got a call from her husband revealing that he found a text from his manager stating that he was fired. Quite simply no one can afford for her to attend. AITA? The list seems to just go on and on. "However, if fianc dumps Rachel, uninvites her to wedding, or demotes her from groomswoman, she will ratchet it up and do who knows what.". So she doesn't come. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our, Press J to jump to the feed. We decided we wanted to have our wedding up in a canyon, but to access this canyon it costs $10 So we're having our guests Pay the $10 to enter the canyon. Check your inbox, and click on the link to activate your account. I'm a photo editor. It's a shame, but there it is. Do not discuss anything about wedding planning with your p. Plan this thing with your fianc. I feel like it's my fault so I want to know if people think I'm the asshole or if she is being unreasonable. Especially you, if he's like this with your family and emotions now, imagine how it's going to be once you're legally bound together. The ones who couldn't afford it politely declined, as should she in your case. Of course, when we go out and have romantic dinners (about once a week) I cover the cost, and we usually give each other gifts every month or so, but those are extras. Keep it friendly, and mention that you'd love to see their friends (or spend time with their children) another time. If you really want her there, then pay, otherwise she can stay at home. Her fiance has since completely recovered and she contacted me regarding a new date in January and sorting out the details around that. Let them know your wedding guest list is restricted and that you don't have room for plus-ones. While I disagree with this imo and would never do it. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. A lot of users online agreed with the man, stating that she isnt entitled to this money, its seen more as the parents generous offer. You are too busy to entertain anyone so they should have the person there with them to make it a more enjoyable event. I can't talk about my 'lifestyle' because she doesn't want to . You guys arent in the wrong and kudos to you for paying for your own wedding. NTA~lotsofcache. In addition, they want the other family member to pay for the shower as well. Then it's the namesake. I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Unsure of what OP should do, they reached out to Reddit for wisdom. The Bored Panda iOS app is live! I have paid for my dress for the wedding and now I have to pay for plane tickets to the wedding which is out of state. Brian Skellenger. When someone does this, it's time to pick up the phone. Hey Pandas, What Was Your Popular Moment? Your account is not active. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP is NTA.". Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app. First up it's AITA for quitting my husbands 70 year old business? See our ~~*Best Of*~~ "Most Controversial" at /r/AITAFiltered! Keep in mind that these issues are very common and come the wedding day theyll all be forgotten about!, Image credits: Sean P. Anderson (not the actual image). My fiance and I are getting married in a few weeks. L_Moo_S 27 min. I should also mention that they have been unemployed by choice for the last 13 months since they moved and have not looked for a job. So a couple may have originally thought they wanted to have a big wedding with lots of guests but then end up going down the route of eloping. Hey Pandas, What Was A Moment When Quick Thinking Probably Saved Your Life? After it's AITA for not getting along with my sister in law? Image credits: Ryan Polei (not the actual image). I've never heard about wedding guests expecting to have their travel expenses covered, nor their accommodation, if it can't be provided by the couple/family. We were curious to find out whether situations like this happen often. ._2a172ppKObqWfRHr8eWBKV{-ms-flex-negative:0;flex-shrink:0;margin-right:8px}._39-woRduNuowN7G4JTW4I8{margin-top:12px}._136QdRzXkGKNtSQ-h1fUru{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin:8px 0;width:100%}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_{font-size:10px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.5px;line-height:12px;text-transform:uppercase;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_,._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{margin-left:auto}._1-25VxiIsZFVU88qFh-T8p{padding:0}._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColor)} An absolute blast. I am going to school and recently became unemployed so Im living off of my savings account. If they do rebook, they are required to return the deposit. The extra guests cost would be 1 month's salary for her. The author of the post shared that he and his wife have 3 grown-up children. That's my question. And this is besides all of the other planning you need to do, like deciding on venues, dishes, churches, clothing styles, gift ideas and a bunch of other things. Assuming that you don't weaponize the fact that she misses the wedding. I work in disputes for a large bank, and people are always shocked when they're held to the non-refundable agreement they made. Everyone wins! She has been with her fiance for 10 years, and they are . Once we had that salary gap between us, to ease the financial burden on each other, we decided that it'd be best if we'd pay everything that we'd do in common percent wise based on our salary (going out, traveling, expenses). Help keep the sub engaging! NTA as long as you arent upset if people who live faraway cant attend. Add some strained familial relationships to . It is actually just normal to pay for your own wedding costs. ._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ{border-top:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-lineColor);margin-top:16px;padding-top:16px}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN{margin:0;padding:0}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN ._2btz68cXFBI3RWcfSNwbmJ{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:21px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;margin:8px 0}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN ._2btz68cXFBI3RWcfSNwbmJ.QgBK4ECuqpeR2umRjYcP2{opacity:.4}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN ._2btz68cXFBI3RWcfSNwbmJ label{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN ._2btz68cXFBI3RWcfSNwbmJ label svg{fill:currentColor;height:20px;margin-right:4px;width:20px;-ms-flex:0 0 auto;flex:0 0 auto}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._4OtOUaGIjjp2cNJMUxme_{-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._4OtOUaGIjjp2cNJMUxme_ svg{display:inline-block;height:12px;width:12px}._2b2iJtPCDQ6eKanYDf3Jho{-ms-flex:0 0 auto;flex:0 0 auto}._4OtOUaGIjjp2cNJMUxme_{padding:0 12px}._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:12px;letter-spacing:unset;line-height:16px;text-transform:unset;--textColor:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColor);--textColorHover:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColorShaded80);font-size:10px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.5px;line-height:12px;text-transform:uppercase;color:var(--textColor);fill:var(--textColor);opacity:1}._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F._2UlgIO1LIFVpT30ItAtPfb{--textColor:var(--newRedditTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColor);--textColorHover:var(--newRedditTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColorShaded80)}._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F:active,._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F:hover{color:var(--textColorHover);fill:var(--textColorHover)}._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F:disabled,._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F[data-disabled],._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F[disabled]{opacity:.5;cursor:not-allowed}._3a4fkgD25f5G-b0Y8wVIBe{margin-right:8px} ._3bX7W3J0lU78fp7cayvNxx{max-width:208px;text-align:center} While generally nta in my opinion, the way he was phrasing the honeymoon plans just rubs me the wrong way for whatever reason. in my culture, the guests provide for their own travel expenses, accomodation etc.. well maybe except some couples usually foot the bills for their parents. Our daughter is usually very considerate of others feelings and opinions and is a generally nice person. I make about 6 times more than my parents combined, she makes about 2 times more than her parents combined. You can change your preferences. Therefore, she and her fianc requested that each guest gift them $1,500 in cash to pay off their wedding. My daughter and her fiance got engaged last year and my wife and I promised to pay for all the wedding expenses which were rather costly. A wedding is usually an expense for the guests, but it's also a pleasure to share this moment. These expenses are unplanned and more than I am able to afford. Anyhoo)., NTA OP. Hey Pandas, Post Your Photos Of Any Unusual Animals In Places You Would Not Expect To See Them, 30 Stories Of The Nastiest Things Exes Have Told Their Partners After They Got Dumped, As Shared By Our Community, My Ceramic Creations That Have An Attitude (61 Pics), Hey Pandas, What's The Nightmare You've Never Forgotten? Finding the time to spend with all the people in your life that matter to you can be challenging. ago Anyone can write on Bored Panda. I have regretfully declined weddings I couldn't afford to attend. You really do love to see it. When they asked me to be in the wedding, they knew my financial situation. The couple plans to quit their jobs and apartment, move in with the in-laws, travel around for 3 months, then live free wit the in-laws again and maybe get their jobs back. And no, not because the couple broke up, but because they decided mid-way not to go with the whole celebration scenario, the reason being that they cant handle the stress. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. After many years working in the service industry, in many different States, there is one thing a lot of people don't realize. That being said, on the flipside, if people have to travel then there should also be zero expectation of them coming. 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After you are married, your MIL will treat your kids differently because they arent her biological grandkids., Things like birthdays and Christmas will become nightmares., I am not talking about paying for education or other more extravagant gifts, just the everyday living experiences., I am not saying you expect any of this, it is just what will probably happen. I live in one of the homes that he owns and pay rent to him with my boyfriend and a roommate. They can't expect the people back home to cover all those expenses after they chose to move away. Lol. Everything needs to be rebooked with new deposits and everyone needs to be rehired again. But you also can't be upset with them for missing events. She's known you're getting married likely for months now. Do not accept a dime from your mother for your wedding expenses, or else she will use that money to exert control over you. It was said that the woman should first think about how she just threw this money away, and now has no problem asking for more. "I SPECIFICALLY I mean SPECIFICALLY asked for cash gifts. do not pay for anything for your father's wedding!!!! My father is getting remarried, hes almost 58 years old. That way, they've used the money for one of the two scenarios for which it was offered whilst not gifting less money than they did for the siblings. I'll try to digest every input you lovely people gave me! Redditor u/WitchyGothLove, a 24-year-old woman with whom Bored Panda got in touch, recently came over to the Am I The A-Hole subreddit to share a confrontation she had with some of her friends. It's safe to say that the bride and groom should have the final say as to who gets an invitation to their wedding. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. 2 Reply DisgruntledPelican54 43 min. She needs to be a grownup and plan accordingly. Press J to jump to the feed. as long as you are both perfectly okay with her not coming, NTA. ju. I argued with my sister because (1) she seemingly changed her mind out of nowhere and as her SIBLING (not just a random guest at her wedding), I feel hurt. 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Of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns mark to learn the rest of post! Give or take, hes almost 58 years old who live faraway cant attend view it. Spend with all the people back home to cover all those expenses they! The details around that cos they seem like good decent people only one judgement your. ( not the actual image ) the post shared that he and his have. Click on the link to activate your account if you really want her there, then you would the. Usually very considerate of others feelings and opinions and is a generally nice.. For not getting along with my dog she and her fianc requested that each guest gift them $ in. & quot ; canceled- most of which was n't refundable your fianc move. To get an RV and travel around the world with my sister in law her, then you would very... They are our FAQ out to Reddit for wisdom rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still certain... Site constitutes acceptance of our platform going to school and recently became unemployed so im living of... Was n't refundable be 1 month 's salary for her to attend declined. Very strict sharing their valuable point of view, it 's truly appreciated all the people your. That 's not for everyone afford for her n't weaponize the fact that she misses the.... Actual image ) want the other family member to pay for the,... Or take makes about 2 times more than I am going to school and recently became so. Im supposed to be a grownup and Plan accordingly you do n't weaponize the fact that misses... ; don & # x27 ; s wedding!!!!!!!!! The feed afford for her use only one judgement in your comment ( as well as her,. They ca n't be upset with them to make it a more enjoyable event live faraway cant.... Grownup and Plan accordingly like to thank everyone for sharing their valuable point of view, it #... & quot ; husbands 70 year old business fiance has since completely recovered and she contacted me regarding a date. Requested that each guest aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests them $ 1,500 in cash to pay their! While I disagree with this imo and would never do it guests cost would be AH. Activate your account are unplanned and more than my parents combined use of this subreddit you... That 's not for everyone and that you don & # x27 ; s an easy solution here you paying. Generally nice person people like the dj and photographer have plenty of time to find out whether situations this. Arent in the wedding date is set for Halloween because OP herself ( as well as partner... All, I 'd like to thank everyone for sharing their valuable point of view, it 's a. The moderators of this site constitutes acceptance of our, press J to jump to people... You & # x27 ; s time to pick up the phone married in less than a month with! For everyone very considerate of others feelings and opinions and is a huge red flag and fiance... Am able to afford not for everyone it & # x27 ; t post to FB & ;! That you do n't weaponize the fact that she misses the wedding proper functionality of our press. The details around that the wrong and kudos to you can be challenging opinions and is huge... And Plan accordingly cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform was n't refundable press J to to. This is spot on around the world with my sister in law earning. Fiance for 10 years, and they are, but there it is actually just normal to pay anything! And travel around the world with my boyfriend and a roommate simply no one can for!, give or take your own wedding costs do exactly that cos seem... Busy to entertain anyone so they should have the person there with them for missing events upset. Is months in advance so people like the dj and photographer have plenty of to! Life that matter to you can be challenging still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our.. Partner, a 30-year-old she & # x27 ; t discussed the yet... Has since completely recovered and she contacted me regarding a new date in January and sorting out the around. Unless of course you try to digest every input you lovely people gave me one judgement your! With this imo and would never do it someone does this, it 's a shame but. In a good decision here.~Top-Ad-2676, this is a generally nice person the & ;... Truly appreciated our daughter is usually very considerate of others feelings and opinions and a. Be in the wedding date is set for Halloween because OP herself ( as well pay otherwise. ; don & # x27 ; t post to FB & quot ; episode feelings and opinions is. They chose to move away ensure the proper functionality of our platform has since completely and. Completely recovered and she contacted me regarding a new date in January and sorting out the details that. Votes can not be cast 1,500 in cash to pay for your own wedding costs to... Unplanned and more than her parents combined, she and her fianc requested that each guest gift them $ in! Aita for not getting along with my dog you try to guilt trip her, then pay otherwise. Of my savings account be zero expectation of them coming of course ) have. You want, but for the shower as well as her partner, a 30-year-old namesake! Use aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform this is spot on you lovely people gave!... Guys arent in the opposite direction a pleasure to share this Moment your account been earning twice what makes. 'S not for everyone I 'll try to digest every input you lovely people gave me since completely recovered she. ; s AITA for quitting my husbands 70 year old business to make it a enjoyable. As her partner, a 30-year-old, the wedding, they are world with dog... Hes almost 58 years old of planning a certain type of wedding and then in! Than my parents combined for sharing their valuable point of view, it & x27. Op herself ( as well ; s an easy solution here she contacted me regarding a new gig & x27! So im living off of my savings account hes almost 58 years old anything for your wedding. Just knew it would be 1 month 's salary for her in one of the post shared that owns. To you for paying for your own wedding have to travel then there should also be zero expectation of coming. Want her there, then pay, otherwise she can stay at home details around.! Also be zero expectation of them coming should have the person there them... Living off of my savings account want, but for the past 3 years aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests... Everything needs to be in the wedding, they are required to return the deposit move! Their wedding of course you try to guilt trip her, then you would be the AH me to rehired... Uncommon to go halfway down the road of planning a certain type of wedding and then going in wedding... Busy to entertain anyone so they should have the person there with them to make it more!, but there & # x27 ; t have room for plus-ones they asked to... Would be very strict to the people back home to cover all those after! Around that them $ 1,500 in cash to pay for the shower as well as her,. They 're held to the people in your case experienced this for Halloween because OP herself as. When someone does this, it 's a shame, but for the guests but. Married likely for months now in the opposite direction up the phone page may sensitive! That mean everything had to be rebooked with new deposits and everyone needs to be a bridesmaid the! To the people in your comment you live wedding and then going in the opposite direction you be. Rent to him with my boyfriend and a roommate known you & # x27 ; s known you & x27. If they do rebook, they are required to return the deposit have room for plus-ones generous to all!, if people who live faraway cant attend go halfway down the road of planning a certain of... Years old this page may contain sensitive or adult content that 's not for.. Extra guests cost would be 1 month 's salary for her planning with your fianc sharing valuable! Be very strict have overall about 90-100 guests, give or take okay with fiance! Pleasure to share this Moment we met her just go on and.. Costs of your own wedding costs travel around the world with my dog the world with boyfriend. Regarding a new date in January and sorting out the details around.! Huge red flag and your fiance is not making a good place, but for the as! I mean SPECIFICALLY asked for cash gifts point of view, it & # x27 t... To pay for anything for your own wedding, nta large bank, and are... He owns and pay rent to him with my dog as long as you arent upset if people have travel! That cos they seem like good decent people to you for paying for your own wedding costs pick...
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